CHIC or SHRIEK - Jay Z Buys Beyonce Dragon Eggs

Beyonce Knowles wakes up in a lot of different ways: like dis, in the kitchen asking “how the hell did this happen, oh baby,” avoiding media requests to comment on her little sister smacking the chic out of her husband in an elevator *of course sh*t goes down when there’s a billion dollars in an elevator.* Well today she is waking up next to a night stand with a bunch of dragon eggs. Yes, you read that right. Dragon eggs. 

Clearly Jay Z has been taking gift giving advice from his BFF Kanye (see Kanye letting his two year old paint on an Hermes bag as a gift for Kim) and bought Bey a collection of dragon eggs.

Now before this goes off the deep end with Kanye grabbing the mic from some poor farmer at a farm convention (do those even exist) and claiming “your eggs are dope and all but Bey had the best eggs of all time. George Bush hates dragons. Beck should give Beyonce’s eggs his Grammy,” no one is claiming they are real dragon eggs. They are props from everyone’s favorite incestual blood bath Game of Thrones. 

Emilia Clarke, the actress who plays Daenerys Targaryen, the mother of all dragons, confirmed that Jay Z allegedly bought the eggs. They were used in a scene where Clarke’s character is presented with dragon eggs prior to her wedding because who needs a Kitchen Aid when you can get a bunch of dragon eggs. Clarke also added the eggs were very expensive, comparing them to Faberge eggs. Of course they are expensive because you know Jay isn’t buying Bey some cheap dragon eggs. These are some Whole Foods level eggs. You buy, for $99, a consumer gift set of Game of Thrones Dragon Eggs at HBO, but these are the real deal.

It makes sense that Beyonce now owns the Dragon Mother’s eggs. I mean she is the Mother of All Independent Women (and gift to us all Blue Ivy). It’s like a gift from one mother to another.

I’m now even more excited for her rumored joint album with Jay Z because now they can do a whole song about how they are so rich that they are running out of things to buy each other, even Faberge esque dragon eggs from hit HBO shows.